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Before Ra She is Angry

Published on: by Tawa'ubast Comment
Today is a Procession of Bast Before Ra, She is Angry.  We are meant to bring beautiful and delicious offerings before Bast to be in Her favor during this day, and yet, it’s late and I have some other things going on.

I cannot, in this state of tiredness, do much for the anger of Bast.  However, I did wind up doing something right by Bast-Mut today.

I started a keto diet recently and was doing good for a while, but then I needed food bad (I live in various places as a flight attendant, commute to another state, don’t have my own car, etc) and cheated on my diet with Chinese food.  WOW.  

Ever since I had cheated on the diet, I felt HORRIBLE.  I felt guilty.  I was putting myself down.  I WAS EATING MY HEART.

I cheated more.  More guilt. More heart eating.

Today, in lack of proper food, time, and more guilt for having eaten cereal for breakfast (the only thing I had), I didn’t eat anything until just now.  Roughly 12 hours of tiny snacks and a small bowl of cereal.  I was starving myself for lack of proper keto food.  For guilt.

My real mom knocked a bit of sense into me, as we were following the diet together, and told me basically to screw the diet, you are starving, you need to keep your metabolism going.

And then as I sat here eating my sandwich and dedicating it to Bast-Mut, I finally felt that jab of an angry goddess who has been teaching me AGAINST eating my heart these past years.  I thought I had finally gotten over it but here I was, doing it in a different way.

So while this has nothing to do with the festival, it does have to do with an angry Bast-Mut.  She is angry because She loves me so much.

And as we share this sandwich together, guilt-free, I feel that yes, I have appeased her.

I am Beloved

Published on: by Tawa'ubast Comment

While the website was born as a desire to round up information on Bast-Mut, it has turned into even more than that.  It has turned into a blog in which I can share my experiences, and know this, my experiences aren’t limited to just Mother alone.

I am beloved of two wonderful Netjeru, both Mafdet and Heru-sa-Aset.

They tend to fall more on the quieter spectrum (save for that one week after Wep Ronpet when Heru was buzzing around with energy!), but they are no less important to me in my life.

Mafdet comes to me, sometimes with the head of a cheetah, sometimes a serval, and She usually means business.  I’ve seen Her described as a “smaller, pointier, Sekhmet,” and gosh that is just so true!  I know there is some warmth there, She’s not business all the time, and yet I feel She always has my back and that I am always protected by Her.  She is primal, fierce, strong.  I still work to understand Her fully and I feel Her through emotional impressions.

Heru had also been quiet for a couple of years, and only recently did He speak up.  After Wep Ronpet, I felt so much energy coming from Him, and our communication was amazing at that point.  He would ‘talk’ to me, and I get him strongly in visuals and also emotional impressions.  I received a very delicious cookie at a hotel during that week and oh boy did He want that!  He got His cookie and He was pleased.  He is a King, and also has serious business to attend to, yet I do get more of a playful side to Him.  He likes to joke a little and tries to keep things more lighthearted.  Still, He protects and watches over me.

I’m considering making each of them their own little page on this site as I have done with Mom.  They deserve all I can give them for all the love and protection they have shown me.

Your Soldier

Published on: by Tawa'ubast Comment

Upon your throne, oh glorious Queen,
It is you before I kneel.
I know you through compassion,
and the flame within I feel.

I walk upon the sands for you,
the heat beneath my feet.
And burning, walk those miles for you,
your strength makes me complete.

Bast-Mut, Queen of Heaven!
Bast-Mut, Queen of Light!
I now see why you have called me,
Your soldier to your side.

Raise your paw, Oh Radiant queen,
And smite the dark within.
I let you lead me to the light,
With a new day to begin.

I step into the shadows,
only guided by your love.
Not fearing as I tread the night,
you’re my guidance from above.

Bast-Mut, Queen of Heaven!
Bast-Mut, Queen of Light!
I now see why you have called me,
Your soldier to your side.

Your joy is pure euphoria!
Yet as Queen you speak commands,
of your children to not eat our hearts,
and live our life in ma’at!

You are the spark of my very soul,
And the passion that burns within.
I sing your song Oh brilliant Queen!
Notes like incense in the wind.

Bast-Mut, Queen of Heaven!
Bast-Mut, Queen of Light!
I now see why you have called me,
Your soldier to your side.

Bast-Mut, Queen of Heaven!
Bast-Mut, Queen of Light!
I now see why you have called me,
Your soldier to your side.

~Tawa’ubastmut

Time to Listen – KRT

Published on: by Tawa'ubast Comment
God radios: How to live with one, how to live without one. What happens if the reception is bad, or the gods quit responding?

Listening.

One of the biggest parts of learning to communicate is learning to simply listen.

With all your senses, listen.

Netjer will speak to you in different ways, in different forms, in different feelings.

When I first started communicating with deities, I realized I had been blessed with a very strong “godphone.”  I hear the voices of my Mother, not with my physical ears, but in the form of an internal dialogue.  Most of the time it’s accompanied by different feelings, based on Her own.  It took me quite some time before I was able to trust the voices in my head as being those of the divine.  Discernment is something that is VERY important to any spiritual practice which involves spirits and deities.

Heru-sa-Aset talks more in images as well as some words.  There was one instance where I was in a semi-meditative state and we were playing chess together.  It was pretty lucid!  Mafdet rarely speaks, but I feel her in image flashes and emotions.  She is like a burning flame just out of reach.

Netjer can be subtle.  They can speak to you in pictures, in synchronicities, perhaps a certain song on the radio at a certain time.

This is where I stress it again.

Listen.

Provide an offering and open yourself up to communication in all forms.  Take notice of anything that might be different, out of place, or at the right place at the right time.  Watch the flicker of a candle as you speak to your deities.  Learn to use a pendulum, or even work with the tarot cards, in moderation.  Often times they prefer us to listen to them directly.  It’s ok to trust the images and impressions you get in your mind!  Just consider them for a time first before you jump to conclusions that it was a communicated message.

You don’t have to hear your gods in words in order to have a relationship!  Sometimes the signal comes and goes, but that doesn’t mean that your gods have left you.  Just because the communication dwindles for a time, and mine has on occasion, it’s important to keep praying and keep listening.  They are there, they are paying attention, but perhaps they want you to take this alone for a time.

And if your communication becomes too good? It’s important to set boundaries and stand up for yourself.  They will understand!  Don’t feel that just because a god is bothering you for something at a bad time, that you need to drop everything and do it.  Take care of yourself.

and Listen.

Song of Strength

Published on: by Tawa'ubast Comment

Bast-Mut, Queen, enthroned and wise,
bring the light so clear.
Take my hand and lead me there,
to a place I hold so dear.

Give me strength~
Give me strength~
Give me courage to defeat the dark within.

Mother, wrap me in your arms,
shield me from my fears.
Hold me against your body warm,
and wipe away my tears.

Give me strength~
Give me strength~
Give me courage to defeat the dark within.

Your light shines gold against the sand,
the brightness brings us peace.
You blast away the shadows,
now the dark within shall cease.

Give me strength~
Give me strength~
You gave me light to fight the dark within.

Give me strength~
Give me strength~
You gave me light to fight the dark within.

~Tawa’ubastmut